Worst Valentine’s Day contest — Come and vote for the best!!

Okay, guys, you seriously have had some bad Valentine’s Days. I received entries by email and on the blog. I said to my husband last night, “I don’t know how I’m going to pick the best three!”

He, in his usual charming way, said, “You made your bed…”

Nice.

Oh, wait, before we get to the official entries, this was my husband’s entry:

I have one. My wife, who is wonderful btw, decided to hold a contest on her blog. The best story about valentine’s day would win a prize. Did she write about how I proposed to her or how romantic I could be at times? Nope, she wrote about yet another encounter with a strange man. Feel the love. 😛

No, he can’t win.

What he doesn’t realize is that talking about wonderful husbands is boring for other people. I’m a writer. I know these things. If I rambled on and on about how amazing and supportive my husband is, I wouldn’t have any followers at all.

Hey! I see your eyes glazing over already!

On to the entries!

Worst Valentine’s Day #1
I can honestly say this is my worst Valentine’s Day ever. My little girl fell out of her bed at 2:30 a.m. yesterday and broke her collarbone (which just happened to be her third birthday).

Something STINKY woke me up at 2:30 a.m. today. Because it hurt to push herself up on the toilet, she wouldn’t go potty. Apparently she could only hold it so long, pulled the No. 2 out, wiped it on her bed and then tried to go back to sleep.

So that’s how the day started.

When I REALLY woke up for the day, I realized that we both have pink eye. Great right? Which would be fine if we could just hang out at home. No dice.

We had to visit the orthopaedic surgeon this afternoon who a) didn’t do anything for her but pin her sling shut and b) happened to be totally gorgeous.

Now I’m waiting for a call from the pediatrician and baking the cake she didn’t get to have yesterday.

No love story here. Just real life.

Worst Valentine’s Day #2
My worst Valentine’s day happened when I was 20. It’s the only year I’ve ever been in a relationship on Feb. 14, and I was SUPER jazzed about it. The problem was that my boyfriend wasn’t all that SUPER jazzed. At first, he said that he wasn’t going to go out with me, so I got a group of friends together to go out. We all got dressed up in black (there’s just something about being anti-pink that makes me feel like I’m sticking it to the man) and planned to meet at Macaroni Grill then see the movie HITCH. My BF was fine with that until he saw how smokin’ I looked and how glowing my smile was. So while we were at Macaroni Grill, he called several times, and talked himself into meeting us for the movie.

Problem: He decided to get completely wasted while he waited for us to finish eating.

When he met up with us, he smelled pretty horrible. We found our seats, and he pulled a flask out and continued to smell horrible. Finally, he snuck out for a bathroom break and got kicked out of the theater.

What I learned: being single is preferable to being left alone by a drunken man – no matter how gorgeous and charming the man 🙁

Worst Valentine’s Day #3
My wife and I attempted to celebrate Valentine’s Day while we were dating and it never worked out. We always ended up in a fight or something bad always happened. When we got married and moved to Boston, we decided that we would no longer celebrate the holiday since it always ended badly. Instead, we decided we would go to Pizza Hut every year on Valentine’s Day because it was our daughter’s favorite place, and because there are very few places less romantic than the Hut. Of course, that year we moved to Southborough, Mass, home of absolutely nothing. We finally found a Pizza Hut several miles away in Framingham, MA and decided to go there for Valentine’s Day. As we drove into the parking lot, we were actually discussing the fact that nothing could go wrong since we were doing the least romantic thing in the world when suddenly there was a loud bang and a fiery explosion next to our car. As we drove into the parking lot, a transformer blew and knocked out power to most of Framingham, Massachusetts. Our bad luck had never affected an entire city before. For the safety of humanity, that was the last time we celebrated Valentine’s Day!

As yesterday, vote in the comments, or shoot me an email to brigidmary@gmail.com, or write it on a paper airplane and throw it at me, or…you get the gist. I’ll post the winner at 8pm tonight.

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