So I work with this guy.

He impresses me in a lot of ways. But the biggest one is that he’s not afraid to hear the word no.

That’s a big deal, if you think about it. How many times have you wanted to ask for something, but you didn’t ask, because you were afraid? Not just of being rejected, but of the other person’s reaction?

Asking for a date.

Asking for a raise.

Asking for help.

Asking a question leaves you vulnerable. There’s an inherent trust in putting a question mark at the end of a statement. You’re throwing a ball and hoping there’s a mitt out there to catch it.

It’s a lot easier to hold on to that ball. Then you don’t have to go looking for it when your pitch flies wide and skids across the field.

But this guy, this guy I admire, he’s not afraid to fling the ball in the air. He’s not afraid to hear the word no. He wants something, he asks for it. With confidence.

He asks with the expectation that people will say yes.

And they do.

There’s a lesson there, I think.

2 thoughts on “Fear

  1. Yeah- for me asking for help is harder than moving a mattress by myself. (prop it up against a wall, prop one end against a book so you can comfortably get your fingers under the edge, lean forward and tell yourself that coolies everywhere the map was pink did this all the time and lift.)

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